Surround Yourself With.... Pt. 2

Saturday May 2 Matthew had found a sermon by David Assherick on youtube and so we decided to watch it as our sermon. It was called Eyes Wide Shut and was talking about faith and how faith is “seeing as God sees.” In three ways. Seeing as God sees 1) yourself 2) others 3) the world. I cannot explain it fully but as I listened I felt the prompting again. How would God see the time I spent with movies? And I knew He wouldn’t approve.

After the sermon I was doing my devotions and I wrote in my journal. “God. I need to make some big changes. Why do I hesitate to do them here? Jesus, I want to live for You. To devote myself for you.” And I broke down crying. Praise God for the Holy Spirit’s continual work. By God’s grace I said to Matthew, “I have to stop watching movies. I don’t know if forever, or what kinds, or what, but for now I can’t watch anything.”

The next day I was in the ER for my appendix. Since then I have had lots of time. Time that I, honestly, would have spent watching movies. When you are sick, you don’t feel like doing much and movies or TV is something common for sick people. As I lay in the hospital bed I thought how amazing God was to have broken through my stubborn heart just before a time where I’d be tempted to watch lots of movies. Not all movies are bad...but so many of them are a waste of time. I believe that God had me come to that conviction right before my surgery so that He could have more time with me.

As I’ve had this time with God I’ve been so blessed. Why do I fill my life with meaningless things…? Probably because it seems easier, but I know for a fact that God is calling me to something more. During my time of recovery I have to walk and there isn’t much room to walk in my apartment so I walk back and forth but God nudged my heart to use that time to sing to Him. So when I walk, I use my hymnal and sing to my King. Could I ever express how my heart has been lifted to Him? I have more time to do my devotions and can take longer with them than before. When I need to rest my abdomen I can lay in bed and read Prophets and Kings by Ellen White. I feel like I’ve been through detox and my body is clean and my head is clear.

God has continued to encourage and strengthen me in the decisions I’ve been making. On Tuesday May 12th I went to browse Eric & Leslie Ludy’s website to see the list of books they recommended. I wanted to find some good books to read that would spiritually uplift me when I got home. I clicked to go to Leslie’s Set Apart Girl website and found her online magazine. I decided to read her article and was blown away by her opening sentence, “About three years ago, I felt a gentle whisper of God’s conviction as I was sitting in a movie theater…” Eagerly I read the article and felt God whisper to my heart, “You see my daughter, I am calling you to more of Myself. To a better life. Lay it down, lay it all down and come to Me.” And so another step was taking, another part of my heart opened as I saw that this was indeed God’s calling. He was calling me away from the world, to Himself.

What really struck me about the article was not only that it talked specifically about movies (with which I had been struggling) but the idea of looking at what we are doing and ask, “Does this bring me closer to God?” “Is this in harmony with the teachings of the Bible?” I know that many of you reading this may saying, “Beth-Anne’s become a fanatic.” But if I really claim to be a Christian, if I really believe that Jesus is coming soon, what am I doing wasting all my time on things that don’t draw me closer to God and don’t have harmony with the teaching of the Word of God.

Leslie writes: Christ makes it clear that we cannot love both Him and the things that charm and ravish this world. We cannot be dazzled by the images of pop-culture and captivated by the King of all kings:

Do not love the world or the things in the world. If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him. For all that is in the world - the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life, is not of the Father but is of the world.
(I John 2:15-16 NKJV)

Adulterers and adulteresses! Do you not know that friendship with the world is enmity with God? Whoever therefore wants to be a friend of the world makes himself an enemy of God.
(James 4:4)

This is not a choice of both. It is either or. We are not called to mediocrity but to a radical lifestyle for Christ.

The people I admire most in life are those who don’t do things like everyone else. Those who live a set-apart life for God. Those who are bold for Jesus and don’t care what others think. Why is it then that I care so much what others think and am so weak to be different even from my own selfish desires?

As I have tried to focus myself less on what the world tries to surround me with and more of God I have found myself listening/watching sermons when I am too tired to do much else. Once again I was blown away by God’s timing. A day or two after reading Leslie’s article I was listening to a sermon that was done at GYC and it was entitled “Because of Those Who Sat”. The sermon preached was about peer pressure, how we are so afraid to do the right thing because of how others will see us. Even amongst our Christian friends we are afraid to be “too religious”. Beloved of God…how can we be too wrapped up in our Savior? If we really believe the Bible how can we live the lives that we do?

I have so much to grow and so much to learn. But I know that God has set aside this time of physical healing for me to heal and grow spiritually.

I was reading in Prophets and Kings about the time of Elijah and how “in anguish of soul he besought God to arrest the once-favored people in their wicked course, to visit them with judgments, if need be, that they might be led to see in its true light their departure from Heaven.” (p. 120) Through that chapter and the next I read about how God only sent the punishments He did to awaken the dulled minds of the people. Then one night as I lay in bed before sleeping I thought about myself and my situation. Could it be that God allowed me to have the appendicitis, or even caused the appendicitis so that I could have this change in my life? Could I have suffered the pain so that I could have freedom and peace in my soul? I thought to myself, it doesn’t matter if He caused me to have the appendicitis because what is the temporary pain compared to the eternal salvation I will have? I used to have a hard time thinking that God would send punishments to people but as I may have experienced a small part of that situation I praise God! I feel so blessed that He would do that for me. His ways are perfect and right. I’m not saying that God sends bad things to people and causes them to suffer all the time. But isn’t it worth it to have a temporary suffering to have eternal joy? Like a mother in labor has intense and terrible pain for a time but then there is a baby. And then all the pain is forgotten in the joy of the child. How much more so, is it for our eternal souls for a better relationship with Jesus?

How can I explain the freedom I feel now? I have much to grow and much to sacrifice but it’s worth it. Over and over it is worth it. This feeling is something only to be experienced I suppose by living it yourself. I want to encourage you, to plead with you to lay it down. I don’t know what you are holding on to or what you refuse to accept but please open your hearts to God. It’s not easy. It has not been an easy journey for me nor do I expect it to be but it’s worth it.
God is calling us to something more. Something so much more than this world yet we refuse to let go of our “pleasures” of this world. Let it go. Let it go so you can really live.

Ask yourself, what do you surround yourself with? Is it more and more of the world, or is it Jesus?